handle with care

can u handle knowing what they really mean when they say "it's nothing"
can u accept the fact that their replies are a result of careful filtering
can u agree with the idea that ignorence is bliss
can u understand when things happen beyond your desires
can u allow past connections lingering in your present
can u handle the truth?
i cant
i thought i could
so i did what i thought i should
confrontation
apparently breeds contentment
apparently i failed to see the small prints below
which read "may result in severe irrational emotional breakdown/havoc/eruption"
but whats done is done
or so i thought
and there i go again
jumping on the front seat of the roller coaster
just so my heart would be ripped outta myself once again
then stuffed back in and force to function well once i felt the earth beneath me
what a shame
that someone like me, who id like to think is capable of some sort of rational thinking
can just snap
bend
rip
and burn
all at once
because of a single expectation
expectation for a solution which never existed
even if in some twisted way it was possible
i could not handle the responsibility
of the sacrifice i begged to hold
and the loss i urged leave
and the truth is
knowing it all
i can't handle it
i can't handle the truth
i should've just stayed still and shut-up