Bored.Bitter.Buntu

i am very bitter at the moment.
because i woke up one day and went with a gut feeling.
i quit. my job
because it wasn't what i wanted to do. it wasn't my passion. it wasn't fullfilling and all that rubbish to make myself feel better. the guilt was lurking by so i had to come up with an excuse. pronto!
so now im jobless and bumming. wasting my time and money and energy just lugging myself around the house feeling so sorry and depressed with myself.
boredom has somehow taken a liking unto me and has self-declared as my best friend.
yay for me.
bluek.
people whom i shall not name names because might be reading this have been nice enough to ask me questions like "why tak kerje?" and "nak jadi apa ni?" and "buat penat belajar jauh-jauh" to somehow tell me that it disgusts them to see me getting dressed in the morning just to plop myself in front of the tv. i know you're all disgusted i see it in your face when your nose flares and your eyebrows unite. bluekkk
the sight disgusts me as well.
so i began job hunting.. all over again.
sent like gazillion emails to gazillion people with zero replies.
how typical.
"no vacany..but we'll keep your resume for future references" tipuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
all lies. hmphh.
don't say things like future references so you would sound polite and politically correct not knowing that being that way would give me some kinda hope and 3 months down the road when/if (hope not) im still jobless id bombard you wh follow-up emails to see if this time theres vacancy. argh
say je la tak nak. kan senang

i dunno if it was a sign from high above or pure coincidence, when i drove past by pwtc i saw the big-ass billboard. its a newly established publication so i figured i should give it a try.
i did.
got an interview.
got it.
want me to start this monday.
beautiful pay.
perfect post.
not exactly my prefered content tho.
then got another interview.
for the ultimate dream job.
was disappointed by the job scope offered and pay was so terribly lowww (passion or not, perut mesti kena isi)
so now i am teramatlah buntu.
decisions decisions.
melepak susah. dpt kerje pun susah
how now?